I figure I should probably say something about the whole flooding situation. Alberta is my home. It always has been and it always will be. It was where I was born and where I grew up and however much I move and however much I claim I am a west coast hippie now, I will always be “Alberta Bound”. Its true. It made me sadder than I thought would happen to see the devastation in Alberta, especially in my hometown of Canmore. It’s one thing to see disasters in nameless places that I have yet to travel to, or places that I have seen in passing, but when it happens to your own home, its a bit of a different story. And I really dont think that I can exactly put into words how it made me feel (I’m not quite the veteran blogger I like to believe I am yet).
But I can say this. It made me realize maybe some more imminently pertinent and personal issues in my life. Some old middle school friends came to visit me this weekend, and while I have kept in touch with them over the years, we have led and continue to lead very separate and very different lives. We have been growing apart for some time now, and even though, I think we will always be friends just because of how long we have known each other, it is now clear to me how much I have actually changed. I have a different lifestyle, different values, and different pastimes. I was trying to grapple with the idea of my town being destroyed and they were busy shopping and worrying about celebrities. This is not what I had in mind for priorities to say the least.
Some things I learned;
-I don’t care in the least what people from high school are doing now. It may sound insensitive, but I mean really; I didn’t exactly form long lasting friendships in that school, and I don’t exactly want to remember my time there.
-If I have to spend more than about 30 seconds putting on “a face” in the morning, I absolutely will not enjoy my day, because it probably means I am doing something mundane and annoying with more annoying people
-I refuse to spend money on food that I can make at home. I mean seriously. WTF. Spend money and don’t get to have fun making it in my own kitchen and don’t get to walk around in my underwear in the process, AND don’t get to tweak it and make it exactly how I want to? Talk about quadruple loss.
-I have changed. Completely. And I have no time in my life to make an effort to cultivate relationships with people I wish to not cultivate relationships with.
-My home is important to me. Not because of my things in my home, but because of the memories that reside in a place. Canmore, Kananaskis and Calgary may not hold any of my worldly goods at the moment, but they do hold the majority of my memories. And when the landscape changes it kind of fucks with those memories. Sounds a little wierd, but I am writing this blog and I will choose what I want to say.
-No matter what, NOBODY, I repeat, NOBODY should or can make you feel like less of a person. No matter what names they choose to call you; no matter what they judge you for; and no matter who they are. You are who you are, you have something in you past they don’t know about, no matter how close they are to you, and every part of your past makes you who you are today, and as such makes you an amazing person.
Ok, enough with the emo kid ramblings. Sorry for that. I will post some recipe goodness soon because that is really all that matters in this world and can make anybody feel better! Some family is coming to visit and will bring some delicious veggies from their amazing farm in the Okanagan. So I will make something with said veggies and share.